Effy Stonem means nothing to me
by madisonrox101
Summary: JJ never means to be brutal, but Freddie doesnt understand. Not completely.


JJ wasnt anything like Effy, and it could be a blessing sometimes. Freddie didnt have to worry about him running off onto strange places in the middle of the night and leaving his bedside until the morning. It was a comfort. Cook thought that nothing was exciting about them, although Cook was single he lived the exciting life and lived everyday as if there wasnt going to be a tomorrow so he would know what exciting meant. He could admit there were times where JJ didnt want to kiss and just wanted to play with his models alone and Freddie was annoyed, but then there were times where JJ just wanted Freddie in his arms more than anything in the entire world. He lived for those days.

"Jesus Christ" Freddie let JJ smile and kiss up his bare stomach.

Soft pouty lips touched his scorching body, letting his tongue softly run on the flesh. He loved when JJ was needy like this, he only needed him and didnt want anyone else. it made Freddie feel important, and powerful. He knew that if didnt let JJ kiss and touch him, than JJ would lose his mind, half in horniness and half in sorrow. It was the only time he had complete control of what was happening in his life.

"I dont even think I deserve you but I have you laying underneath me and-" JJ rambled off leaving the small licks turning dry and cold, and the kiss marks werent even cooling Freddie down anymore. JJ struck a chord in Freddies system.

"You dont deserve me?" Freddie spoke in question

"What the fuck does that mean?" "Well Effy really deserves you, but I like what I have now so I want you while this lasts" JJ never means to be brutal. He never means to be anything but perfectly nice and kind. Freddie understands yet doesnt. He made it perfectly clear that he didnt want Effy anymore because he didnt and it was the truth, but why would JJ think the exact opposite.

Of course there were times back then when Freddie could have said he wanted nothing to do with Effy but everyone would know he was lying. But this time he wasnt, JJ was all he had, all he wanted. JJ was the only one that didnt completely fuck him over. He hung on to that with everything, It took a year for him to notice that the feeling inside him when Cook would occasionally give JJ little kisses or tight hugs was jealousy not him just being weirded out by their friendship.

" JJ i want you, I dont want Effy anymore. We had our shot but we ended it remember?" Freddie speaks and then bites down on his lip, he can almost taste blood in his mouth as he bites harder. Remembering their times together is painful and he hates it. How hard they fell and rose back again. They did so much together and went through a hell of a time. It almost makes Freddie cry until he realizes that crying over a girl is incredibly gay.

"Of course I do, but that doesnt mean that somewhere you still love her. I know- Well I hope that you love me. But sometimes I cant help feeling that you want this to be effy with you instead of me" JJ wasnt upset or angry he was content, sating these things as if they were fact. Freddie wants to throw JJ off of him and scream in his face. Calling him a retard or something else ridiculous that people used to say about JJ. Instead he gently pushes JJ off of his torso and sits up at the edge of the bed. He looks around at his room, pictures hanging of him and his gang. Cook kissing Effy forcefully and she's smiling and JJ is kissing Freddie and Naomi and Emily and Pandora and Thomas stand awkwardly together for a picture Effy's big brother Tony took a year ago.

"I wish you would give me alittle fucking credit. I dont love her okay, I used to. I can promise you JJ that Effy and I are completely over. No going back remember?" Freddie looks over his shoulder at JJ, who's sitting Indian style on the bed with his hands in his lap.

" No going back. Im sorry" JJ says as he twiddles his thumbs and lowers his head a little. Freddie tries smiling but cant. Effy is still on his mind, memories are his head and he doesnt want them to be. He lost his best friend because of her, he lost himself because of her. He was through with her, he had moved on. He hadnt mentioned her name in an entire year and a half and now she's all he can think about. Freddie attacks JJ's lips and he doesnt feel anything. Of course he feels JJ kissing back and JJ's hands on his waist and Freddie feels the softness of JJ's jaw but nothing emotional. He doesnt feel butterflies and electricity. So he kisses harder and thats when he feels everything. All of his senses come to life when JJ laces his fingers with Freddies, Freddie smiles through their kiss and Effy's gone. Memories are gone and gone for good.


End file.
